Food Allergies Archives - Our Stable Table

Feeding Echo and Finding Purpose – Our Life with FPIES

September 25, 2015 by Carrie 3 Comments

A few weeks ago, our local news station asked our family to do a news segment on FPIES. We talk about FPIES almost weekly here in an effort to raise awareness around food allergies, and I’m all about raising awareness wherever and whenever I can. So, of course we said yes.

{Watch our story here.}

Our awesome story teller, Kerry Tomlinson. — Our wonderful story teller, Kerry Tomlinson.

I love the story, I love how well they captured the sweetness of my boy, his gentle, joyful spirit, and most of all his interaction with his dad. The news got about 85% of the story right, and I’m grateful for that. But they missed a few details, and one major detail that I want to express:

Echo’s illness changed everything.

From the ashes of that first year, a new life was born. I don’t mean a human life, (although we were terrified of losing our baby for the first 18 months of his life). But this. This work, this site, this whole idea was formed from the grief.

Hospital — Echo, two days old and fighting for his life after a stroke.

In the summer of 2014, my long-time friend, Jessica, asked me to write our story for The Leaky Boob. I was in the middle of dealing with massive PTSD, chronic mastitis from exclusively pumping milk from boobs that just wanted to quit, a crumbling marriage, and figuring out a way to keep our son alive and thriving in the midst of an illness nobody, even specialists, know much about. He had three “safe” foods at the time: TED breastmilk (wherein I was limited to 12 foods at one point in time), coconut oil, and spinach. Nightmares of feeding tubes and bankruptcy and divorce tormented my sleep, while emotional paralysis, physical pain, and extreme anxiety plagued me during the day.

Echo's second FPIES vomit-to-shock reaction. — Echo’s second FPIES vomit-to-shock reaction when he was 8 months old.

I said yes to telling our story. Beyond the fear and the trauma, I knew other families were dealing with the same issues. They were dealing with the despair, discouragement, and constant barely-subdued terror that their child might not make it. And what if their kid does make it? What kind of life and wounds will this struggle indelibly imprint their little bodies and spirits with? I started three drafts, scrapped them all, and then Echo had a vomit reaction to green beans in the middle of it all. And that was it. The impetus I needed to get it all out in real time.

This season. Trying to keep it all together and almost losing our marriage in the process. — This season. Trying to keep it all together and almost losing each other in the process.

Our story isn’t just for FPIES families, though. It is for every family who has faced unimaginable obstacles and trauma. Maybe it looks like FPIES, maybe it looks like unknown illness, maybe it looks like a brain tumor or infant hearing loss. Maybe it looks like a massive struggle with self-care or divorce or being a terrible friend for a season.

EchoandLance — Echo eating for the first time at a chain restaurant.

Telling our story gave me access to the power I needed to find my way through, even though I never quite knew the next step until I took it. It gave me just enough Brave to inch ahead of my Scared, and continues to fuel the heart of this little corner of the Internet where I believe Everyone deserves a seat at this table.

Thank you for being a part of this community.

Thank you for continuing to give us, and other families, a voice.

Thank you for sharing posts that are relevant to you with people you love.

Thank you for enjoying the food and laughter and tears and gathering here to have a human experience. This doesn’t happen without you.

Thank you.

Love,
Carrie, Lance, and Echo

“Things falling apart is a kind of testing and also a kind of healing. We think that the point is to pass the test or to overcome the problem, but the truth is that things don’t really get solved. They come together and they fall apart. They come together and they fall apart again. It’s just like that. The healing comes from letting there be room for all of this to happen: room for grief, for relief, for misery, for joy.”

― Pema Chödrön

11 Ways To Keep Food Allergy Kids Safe

September 10, 2015 by Carrie Leave a Comment

It’s back to school time. I heard the internet’s collective cheer as parents and children started a new school year, and then the following week grumble as new clothes lost their shimmer and the reality of the next nine months starts to settle in like a fog.

With every new school year comes an increasing debate around food allergies. Peanuts, tree nuts, soy, dairy, wheat, avocado, strawberries, eggs, fish, chicken, you name it, someone is allergic to it. (Whatever we are doing as a society with and to our food, it’s beginning to emerge as allergies in our children. But that’s another post.)

My son, E, is one of those allergy kids. In fact, his allergies are so severe, I cannot send him to group childcare or preschool. I want him to have the socialization. I think it’s incredibly important. But his list of allergens is so extensive, group settings with other small children just isn’t safe.

But one day, my kid will have to go to school. He’s outgrowing many of his allergies, and by the time he’s ready for kindergarten, I’m hopeful that he will be completely okay. Chances are slim that wheat and eggs will ever be okay for him, though. And I think peanuts will always pose a problem while he’s young.

So, as the school year pushes into full swing, so does the conversation around eliminating certain foods from our schools. It’s a hot topic this year, and we are all divided. I’m always going to side with the most vulnerable among us, especially because this hits so close to home. This isn’t a debate about anything. This is about caring for children who could die from inhaling PEANUT DUST. Or vomits to shock from a crumb of wheat.

Wash hands after eating. My niece, who is allergic to peanuts, reacts to traces of peanut residue on the shopping cart. My son pukes when he gets a tiny crumb of wheat. Wash hands, okay?
Wipe mouths after eating. If you think your child might put their hands in their mouths after eating, go ahead and wipe their mouths. If you plan on kissing or hugging a kid with food allergies, take this to heart. Your love should not cause pain.
Create a safe zone. Remove shoes before entering a house where children have food allergies. If you have someone over who has food allergies, wipe surfaces down, and give a good sweep or vacuum.
Don’t mix food with toys. Don’t allow food to be in the same space as toys. Contact reactions are real, and they’re scary. Kids eat in a designated area, kids play in designated area and wash hands after eating, before playing.
Consider changing your routine. If you or your child eats peanut butter or wheat bread at home before school, consider eating first, then washing hands and face, brushing teeth, and then changing clothes to minimize contact.
Take allergies seriously. Yep, food allergies are a total pain in the peanuts. I get it. But you know what’s more painful? People (and specifically children who are too young to fully advocate for themselves) dying from a speck of peanut dust they inhaled that could have easily been prevented. Why did they die a needless death? Because you wrote the mom off as crazy. And speaking of crazy…
Acknowledge the crazy. Parents of children with food allergies are totally crazypants. I’m raising my hand here because it’s true. But imagine the entire world was full of poison that could kill your child at any given moment and the only thing standing between death (or a trip to the ER) and your kid is YOU. All the time. You would be crazy, too. Hug that frazzled mom next time you see her.
Skip food crafts. Macaroni art or jewelry making? Use toothpicks or beads. I’ll buy some for your classroom, and I’m sure every food allergy parent would gladly buy the supplies.
Talk to your kids about food allergies. Your children are soaking up every attitude you have, more than every word you say. The words are still important, though. Talk to them about the importance of keeping each other safe and discuss ways you can work together to keep their friends safe.
Volunteer to eliminate peanuts (or known allergens) from your child’s school lunch. Keeping our kids safe in community space relieves massive pressure for Crazypants Allergy Mom and Dad.
Become an advocate. Be a safe harbor for these kids. Advocate for their safety, just as you would if it was your child in danger. Learn how to use an Epi pen. Learn CPR and brush up on food handling safety. Be a vocal supporter in the PTA, support separate eating areas and safe classroom policies. Give Crazypants Mom and Dad a hug and a bottle of wine when you see them.

Every child deserves to feel and be safe in our schools. You can help make that happen. Now, go forth and switch your peanut butter sammies to sunbutter and try to keep your sanity this school year. And for the love of Zeus, STOP MINIMIZING ALLERGIES. It’s harmful and directly hurts the children in your community.

Your Crazypants Allergy Mama,
Carrie

Hemp Heart Crusted Zucchini Fries {Vegan, Paleo}

July 15, 2015 by Carrie Leave a Comment

I know. You just read “hemp” in the title and immediately assumed it was about marijuana. I GET IT. I live in Oregon, where it is now legal to smoke, grow, and posses these controversial little plants.

But that’s not what this post is about. Because I’m not about to touch that conversation with a 10 ft ~~bong~~ pole.

Hemp hearts. These are the shelled seeds of the hemp plant, and they are loaded with maximum nutrition. Back when we were trying to find new and varied protein sources for my food intolerant toddler, these were a saving grace. I mixed them with a little bit of raw honey to make them barely sticky, and gave my kid the spoon.

He was a serious fan.

Now that summer is squarely upon us, I have zucchini coming out of my ears. It’s one of my kid’s favorite foods so I planted a few little seedlings…and they grew. In fact, they’re mutant and grow as big as my head. Or roughly seven times as big as my hand.

We have to get creative to use them all, so I’ve been trying out different recipes using as few ingredients as possible to maintain the natural flavor of the fantastic zucchini, and to get them out of my kitchen fast.

I made a fast coating of hemp seeds, arrow root, a dash of tumeric, paprika and salt. They were a fast hit with my family, and we chowed all of them.

ALL. OF. THEM.

They went so fast that I didn’t even manage to get a good picture because they were so tasty and nobody could wait for a dumb camera.

Did I mention they’re paleo and vegan, too?

Ingredients:

1 large (ish) zucchini, cut into sticks
1/2 cup hemp hearts
2-3 Tbsp arrow root powder or tapioca flour
1 tsp salt
1/4 tsp tumeric (optional)
dash of paprika
small bowl of water
Coconut oil for cooking

Instructions:

In a medium frying pan, heat 1/4 inch of coconut oil until hot. (Typically medium+ setting, but don’t let it smoke.)
Combine hemp hearts, arrow root, and spices and blend throughly.
Take a piece of zucchini and dip it in the water. Remove and lightly shake excess water off.
Press each flat side firmly in the flour mixture and then place into hot oil, flat side down.
Rotate the zucchini to get both flat sides nice and brown (2-3 min each side). Be careful not to burn them!
Place on paper towel lined plate to drain off excess oil.

Eat as soon as they are cool! These stay fresh and delicious for a good 30 minutes after cooking.

What are your zucchini hacks?

Zzzzz,
Carrie

Salted Sunbutter Cups with Raw Chocolate {Paleo}

July 6, 2015 by Carrie Leave a Comment

Sunbutter Cups Bite — Joy comes in a new, creamy, salty, sweet form.

Friends. I’ve done the unthinkable.

I’ve given up refined Sugar for the summer.

No Salt & Straw.

No Petunia’s.

No sweet treats from Cascadia Bakery.

Because I have a problem. Sugar means too much to me. I can’t resist it right now. I need to give it up for a while until I can use it responsibly.

Which might be never. But I’m giving it until September, just to be sure. Because I don’t want the diabeetus.

One of my favorite treats is chocolate and peanut butter, but because of FPIES, we can’t keep peanuts in the house. I love sunflower seed butter (aka sunbutter) as a substitute for peanut butter. It’s safe for peanut and tree nut allergy peeps, and gives a comparable, creamy taste. I don’t miss it peanut butter at all. In fact, you can pretty much always find me with a spoonful of sunbutter in my hand when I get too busy and forget to feed myself.

I’m also pretty committed to using raw cacao nibs when possible. Raw cacao is full of antioxidants, magnesium, potassium, fiber, and can help fight heart disease and lift your mood naturally. With a little bit of coconut oil for good measure, these treats aren’t just freaking delicious, they’re also super healthy for you.

Sign me up. Twice.

I shared these with some of my best friends who are also trying to leave that jerk, Sugar, behind. The consensus? We can no longer live without them.

Ingredients for Chocolate Layer:

1/2 cup ground cacao nibs (I use my nutribullet, but a coffee grinder would work, too.)
1/3 cup coconut oil, melted
1-2 Tbsp raw honey, or erythritol
1 tsp vanilla extract

Ingredients for Sunbutter Fudge Filling:

3/4 cup sunbutter
1/4 cup coconut oil
2 Tbsp raw honey or erythritol
1 tsp vanilla extract

Directions for Chocolate Layer:

Whisk together all the ingredients until fully incorporated.
Pour into lined cupcake or mini-cupcake molds, filling about 1/3 of the way.
Pop in freezer for 15 minutes until solid.

Directions for Sunbutter Fudge:

Whisk all ingredients together.
Pour mixture on top of frozen chocolate.
Freeze or refrigerate until firm.
Remove from refrigerator or freezer for 3 minutes, add flake salt on top, and devour.

These stay good forever in the freezer, and several weeks in a sealed container in the refrigerator. But good luck. The sunbutter cups haven’t survived 24 hours in my house. Maybe ever.

Open your heart and let the sunbutter in,

Carrie

Life With Food Allergies: How FPIES Made Me A Better Mom

May 21, 2015 by Carrie 7 Comments

May is Food Allergy and Celiac Disease Awareness month. I’ve been avoiding the topic because it just feels too big and all-consuming. This is something I deal with every single minute of every day as a mom to a toddler with FPIES, which in short, makes my son allergic to food. He’s just a few weeks shy of his second birthday and has exactly 17 foods he can safely consume.

Eating French Fries — Eating potatoes with Dad.

I mention his food allergies often on social media. I’ve written about it here and over on The Leaky Boob. I sometimes get lost in the specific restrictions and frustrations FPIES inflicts on our little family. I start to resent how profoundly our lives are marked by this disease.

But here’s the thing about being a parent to a remarkable kid with special challenges: it has made me a better mom, and on a larger scale, a better human.

I take nothing for granted.

After nearly losing my son to a stroke 36 hours after he was born, I am keenly aware that his presence on this earth is a gift. When his first foods made him vomit to shock, and he was restricted to only breastmilk and a little organic coconut oil for the first 12 months of his life, I wept with relief when he passed spinach at 13 months with flying colors. It never occurred to me to be thankful for every breath, every bite of food that passes my lips, but he reminds me. His breaths, his bites, his life all serve as a reminder to be grateful.

Empathy is a second skin.

I’ve always been fairly compassionate and empathetic, but having a son with chronic allergies has given me a sense of empathy I never knew existed. Any parent who has walked a rocky road with their kids can agree: You never look at a kid or family with special challenges the same way again. It’s no longer a detached empathy. It becomes personal to you, too.

I’ve become the anti-helicopter parent.

It’s counter-intuitive. My son is allergic to food. And guess what? Food is everywhere. Play dates, people’s houses, playgrounds, toddler music class, dog food dishes, restaurant high chairs and booster seats, trash cans, floors, walls, ceilings, shopping carts, faces, hands, mouths, toys…you can’t escape it. I have to be a helicopter parent in social situations, especially when other kids are present. He has so many restrictions, and when I have the opportunity to let my guard down in a food-safe place, I do. I let my son roam within my eyesight, climb and test his limits, and explore to his heart’s desire. I encourage him to play on his own and have age-appropriate adventures and only intervene when absolutely necessary. After seeing him suffer more in two years than many will suffer in a lifetime, the minor bumps, bruises, and messes don’t seem to bother my son, so I don’t let them bother me, either.

Beach Adventure — This kid loves the ocean, even when it’s 57 degrees.

I put up a fight.

Before becoming a parent, I often felt nervous expressing an opposing view point, or challenging authority. I feared losing friends (and even family) by becoming too opinionated or outspoken. Having a child with severe allergies makes it impossible to not offend people. I feel zero hesitation telling strangers not to touch or offer food to my son. I wipe my friends’ kids down with a wet paper towel before they play together. I speak often and loudly about respecting parents and their choices, allergies or not. I openly advocate for causes I believe in without apologizing, even when I know it will turn some people away. Most surprisingly, I don’t really care.

I question everything.

I call food companies and inquire about any hidden, unspecified ingredients. I inspect every space that has been deemed “safe” for my son. I question every test, procedure, medication, and diagnosis my son’s doctors try to administer, and generally annoy the crap out of them. And I have no problem educating doctors about the specifics of FPIES because most don’t know about the syndrome, and if they do, it typically isn’t much. It’s not their fault. FPIES is relatively unknown, and until this month, didn’t even have a medical diagnosis code. Considering I’ve spent the last 18 months immersed in research, and am an expert when it comes to my son, I don’t expect the doctors to have a firm grasp on his condition. I listen, I stay open, and I respect their training. Then I weigh the potential benefit and the potential harm and advocate for what is best for him.

DrAllen — My son with one of his favorite doctors.

I own my strength.

I pumped every single day for 21 months. I fought post partum depression and PTSD while figuring out my baby’s food allergies and dealing with insurance and doctors and mounting medical bills. I went on a Total Elimination Diet and stuck to it for a year in order to keep my milk safe and allow my son’s gut to heal, even though I dreamed about Eggs Benedict and wanted to submerge myself in a vat of guacamole. I had to be disciplined. My son’s life depended on it. I also fought to keep my marriage intact, even when the pressure of that first year nearly shattered us. Owning the hardship and vulnerable places allowed me to own my strength, too.

I crack jokes ALL THE TIME.

I feel my feelings, and I can get stuck in FeelingLand. Humor is one way for me to deal with the overwhelm. I have fully embraced my snark and wit and unladylike bathroom humor. Remember that quote “the only way out is through”? I choose to get through it with laughter and sarcasm. Because it doesn’t matter HOW you get through it, it just matters that you do.

Gratitude.

Empathy.

Trust.

Tenacity.

Curiosity.

Strength.

Humor.

These are the ways FPIES and my son have made me a better mom and human. I’ll take it.

Eff you, Fpies.
Carrie